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Showing posts from October, 2011

Two by The Hand

You may be wondering why I keep emphasizing partnerships and collaboration. It's because I truly believe that there is something special about sharing your life with someone and with others. But here's another reason why. I get the sense that we live in a world where there's a lot of pressure to sacrifice your life and I don't agree with it. I've probably been watching more tv over the last 15 months than I have over the last decade or so literally. And drama tv has presented interesting stories and concepts of which you find a lot of shows on what I call sacrificial love. Don't get me wrong parents do it all the time. But remember the saying that is not only wise but a blessing also to leave your children and your children's children an inheritance? The end result of sacrifice should be improved lives. If not you're asking for strained relationships at the very least. That's why I heavily promote sharing and collaboration because you get the mos

Into the Holiday Season

Monday starts the beginning of the Holiday Season. After Halloween we'll be full swing into the last two major holidays of the year. While everyone is putting on costumes and other acts often time the masquerade begins and many go on forgetting and losing themselves, lost amongst the crowd. That's why this is a good time to know the difference between the act and what's reality. I find myself thinking on these few statements. Perhaps you'll grab yours and take them into the holiday too. "You are a royal diadem in the hands of the Lord"... Yes I remember me!

Determining Best Interests

Pretense, pretending, putting on facades or any other ingenuine demonstration is never the road to wholeness in relationships especially when it comes to family. I've heard that some people will go to the end of the earth trying to avoid having "real" talks or getting to the very grain of an issue is extremely hard. For this reason you have to assess what's in the best interest of the whole. I see why removing yourself from the equation is sometimes necessary. I also know why taking the very hard step of addressing tough issues is paramount. The bottom line is you have to weigh them out and determine your course of action. Here's one thing I know, when relationships are on the line and people still want to avoid setting the relationship on course it may be an indication that there is nothing left of the relationship to salvage.

A seed...

Everything starts with a seed-not literally but figuratively. It could be a seed of moral goodness or deception. But the key is to examine the seeds that have taken root and sprouted.

Family Essentials

Honesty and trust are two of the most essential components of a family relationship keeping it strong. However a breach of such can cause irreparable damage destroying relationships that may never be salvage.

Out of Love

Parents don't be afraid to parent your children hence your title would suggest the obligation of doing so. Of course if you are ole school than you take the liberty of including matriarchs and elders. One of the most valuable forms of parenting is being able to direct your children when they are getting off course. Contrary to the thoughts of young people this doesn't take away their ability to grow into independent adults it helps them along in that process. Most teens don't know that maturity is a major attribute of independence or at least being independently happy. Sometimes you have to establish or set aside downtime for your children. You do it on purpose to help them clarify goals, discover who they are and provide direction. It's guaranteed that they will not like it but in years to come they'll thank you for establishing a process in their lives of direction and self-discovery. Your family should all be able to say at least one major thing that they ar

Putting On The Ritz or Not

When Fred Astaire put on the Ritz it was a dazzling show. Dove-tail Tuxedo's a cane, spats, and a hat to match. No mistaken those syncopated beats, a cadence of steps and three-quarter turns. However, wonderful and exciting it may have been it's important to make sure that we're not always “putting on the Ritz” in our lives to the point that our stories feel so contrived. What am I saying, when you sit down and have honest talk with family don't try and dazzle the truth with unnecessary fabrication be candid and sincere because that is truly the place that people will know you and it is also the place where lifelong lessons are learned. I can remember having these heartfelt talks with the elders in my family it kept me grounded. Moreover I didn't have to pretend in my own life. When you give your children that you help them discover who they are and take a lead role in their own lives.

A Sail...or A drift..

Keep your family a sail. Just as you plan goals and work to complete them do the same for your children and a family as a whole. You'll find that when you're family has a vision you're always working toward a known goal that can be shared together. Even if the goals are individual discussing them with one another if nothing more allows the family to encourage and celebrate your vision. This type of continuous positive activity breeds success in families.

Using Fall Break to Push You Forward

I'm not sure if this is the case for all school children but Fall Break started this past Friday for us. For those who had New Year's resolution/goals this is a great time to push forward to complete any short term goals that you had planned to do so by the end of the year. So if you're in Fall Break (or starting one soon) fall forward in other words use any special time you have to increase your momentum to finish projects by this coming December. Who knows you may find that you finish ahead of time.

Love is in the air...

Last year during the holidays I created a fragrance called Love Noir. Some have wondered the story behind it's title and creation. It was made with this in mind: When the light of my soul can bounce off you and illuminate even the very air we breathe, now that's a love noir anything else isn't defined by this kind of love.

Thought For The Day

I've always had a "keep your head up philosophy" because you can see where you're going when you are looking straight ahead. A down-trodden approach hinders forward movement and if nothing else limits visibility. Try driving a car with your head down. For this same reason, I believe the affairs of business should be done much the same knowing exactly what you plan to do, why you are doing it and looking in the direction of that goal.

Thought For The Day

Fall is really here. For those of us who have been basking in this beautiful weather enjoy it while it last. While you're out though, don't forget to look at the leaves and see the change in color, if you see those burnt orange, copper and golden-wine leaves you know you've spotted the seasons changing however subtle it may be. Fall also signifies the end of the year. Yep we're in the last quarter of the year; Thanksgiving is around the corner and Christmas not too far behind. But much like a cold winter's morning fall is a time of quiet reflection as well. With a cup of your favorite soup sitting in front of the computer working a quick glance out the window and your thoughts can drift away. You know what I say keep a notepad handy for quick thoughts that you can ponder on fully later.  While I was cooking soup and listening to some music these were the fleeting thoughts as I stood cooking a pot of comfort soup. Love yourself in your wholeness and as you make all

Something to think about

While away at a conference I got a chance to see a relative I hadn't seen in a while. It was nice to have lively discourse and conversation with my cousin. Somehow we ended up on topic of secrets. It was really funny and we found ourselves laughing about the matter. I wanted to bring the subject matter to you and see your thoughts. It is always interesting to see how initial perceptions can be formed depending on information. The initial thought that provoked the conversation is that if you have knowledge of something its not a secret. But I shared a different point of view. I defined a secret as knowledge not shared purposely to another individual. The reasons can vary but for the sake of this conversation the idea is to conceal the fact that some wrong or transgression had occurred. To help illuminate the understanding I said this: You may know two people, both of whom you are close with. That does not mean that you know those two individuals did something out of your pre

Thought for the day

To be friends is to genuinely have the others best interest, to have found a soul that you have shared many talks over the years and still manage to do the same in the hereafter. Friendship begins at a point of peace. The sincere friends of this world are as ship lights in the stormiest of nights. Giotto di Bondone

Back to school: Bullying

In my reading this week I learned that they are looking to pass or have passed legislation regarding cyber bullying. I think it’s great but I want to talk about bullying in general not just on the internet. Unfortunately bullying makes its way from the classroom, to the school yard, to the internet and out in society. Some schools have become proactive in putting up bully boxes around the hallways and corridors so that children can address the matter privately if they are fearful. Growing up I was taught never to indulge a bully and so I didn’t. The reality is this friendship doesn’t have to be a painful situation. There are times when friendships will develop out of conflict but more often than not the path to a becoming a friend is an enjoyable process. I can say that with certainty. When you are clear about what friendship is and how it feels then you can have the right perspective about bullying. The intent of bullying is usually humiliation and intimidation. Often these issues are

Thought For The Day

Sometimes we have to tell ourselves to just complete the darn thing and perfect it later. Some of the best "works" considered may be awaiting the arrival of our “works” to sit among them as suitable rivals and playmates.